It is mid-October. The early morning air is crisp and cool, the sunlight has the colour of honey. Standing on the second-floor balcony of her house, she is fidgeting with her old mobile. It's an old model of Nokia, with beautiful sky-blue colour. This mobile has witnessed many happy moments of her life. It is privy to many sad moments too.
She opened the gallery of the mobile. A deluge of memories came gushing by. There's the picture of her soft, fair palms, adorned by Bridal mehendi. She on the day of her aiburo-bhat, a plate full of delectable dishes in front of her, ready to be eaten. She in a bright yellow saree, with brigher shade of yellow turmeric pasted on her cheeks, an entourage of aunties and friends surrounding her. She in the bright red Benarasi Saree of a bride, exchanging garlands with him. She smiling coyly at the camera, her forehead full of bright red sindur, just applied by her husband, the sacred fire being the witness. She in the bright green jardousi saree, her hand entwined in his hand, both smiling at the camera, on the day of their wedding reception.
Then there are pictures of their honeymoon by the sea-side.
Their first Valentines Day celebration together.
First anniversary.
First Durga Puja after their marriage.
Now she opened the audio-files. He calling her whore. She recording the abusive languages to be produced to court for getting divorce from him.
The weight of these memories feels heavy on her heart, as if they are almost crushing her soul. Her heart is too tired to carry on these memories. They lie hidden somewhere in the labyrinth of her mind. The Nokia phone with it's sky-blue colour makes them re-surface in her mind, intensifying her suffering, her pain.
She tried to get rid of the phone in past six months, after they legally parted their ways. She tried an assortment of ways. The first thing she did after the divorce was to purchase a brand new Samsung mobile. She then discreetly removed the sim card from her old Nokia mobile, and inserted the same in her newly purchased one. Now the remaining task was to dispose the old mobile. On one occasion, she placed the old mobile on a bench of the Railway platform, before boarding the train. A tea-vendor patrolling the platform yelled, "Didi, you are forgetting your mobile. Look on the bench, here." "Sorry", she mumbled and placed the mobile back in her handbag. On another occasion, she tried to throw the mobile in the water of the Ganga river. While she was taking a last look at it, at the life she has left behind, somebody on the Howrah bridge thought that she had plans of committing suicide and came hurriedly to alert her. No doubt, she was deeply ashamed and had to leave the place in a hurry. There were many failed attempts after that. Now she has gave up those ill-conceived plans.
She decided to keep the mobile locked up in the farthest corner of her wardrobe. The Nokia mobile with beautiful sky-blue colour. The bitter-turned beautiful life. The life with her first love. The death of her first love.
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